Its time for Santa to come down from Antartica and give me a present in form of good appraisal and Salary hike. Yooo.. But before accepting this valuable present, ( dont know how much valuable will this present be, or better to say will I even get it or not ) I thought I should take a trip to home. I took a sick leave for 26th to 29th Dec with comments "I am going to fall sick from 26th to 29th." which interestingly got approved (funny cooporate culture. Isnt it ?) It was 21st night 11 pm when I booked the ticket for 22nd night (Friday) 2:45 am plane. (Well its not funny. It really a good feeling to finally get a ticket for a 2:45 am plane, when everything else travels, trains, planes is booked and everyday dad calling and scolding "you haven't booked the tickets yet ??? You are a completely useless fellow!") After an hour or so I got an email "your PNR number is XXXXX. ... Date: 22nd Dec Time: 2:45 am" 22nd Dec 2:45 am. hmm.. I thought how many hours still left to go home. And suddenly a thin shiver travelled from my abdomen to center of my skull and gave a blink. It was just 3 hours left ! I was so stupid. I wanted to book for 22nd Night means 23rd early morning 2 am. Damm !!
After rescheduling, finally I was before the Kingfisher counter in mumbai airport on 23rd Dec at 2am. The beautiful girl had finally found time for me after the long discussion with the angrez. ( I was wondering whether who was more chipku - the angrez or the KF girl ?) She told me "Good Morning" at 2 am when I was half sleepy and handed me the boarding pass. After security checkin I sat in a place from where I could see everybody (or better to say every girl). hmm .. there were few butterflies around for the same flight (For a moment I started believing my non-gujju friends who always said gujju girls are beauty queens) Aaaha, lets hope anyone of them would have a seat just beside me. The flight was delayed. Finally I was in the air bus and no sooner I found 30A, I jumped on it. The two seats beside me were empty. All hopes went in vein when a lady came along with her small 5 year old girl and took a place beside me. But it was good since there were two kids in the seat now and it was going to be a fun journey. The lady said "honey, u want to hug a pillow?" The kid agreed and took a small pillow and hugged it happily. (I thought of hugging the air hostess). Then the small girl said "mom, i dont feel comformatable in shoes". Her mom took out her shoes and the kid shaked her small hanging legs giggling. (I thought of taking out my shoes but that would make everyone around me hold their nose). hmm ... then there came along lime juice! The kid overflowed the liquid from our mouth falling it around everywhere. Her mom scolded her. I thought "so stupid kid". It was then I hit the elbow with the corner of seat and large amount of juice overflowed the plastic bottle and fell on my pants. Damm !! I thought "wat would people think if they saw it". In no second, I took out a magazine and kept it in my lap hopping everything would dry off before I reached. I looked at the small girl sitting beside me. She was watching cartoon channel and laughing. I smiled and closed my eyes. I thought of home, mom, dad, sis, ... days i spent in Ahmedabad ... and donno when I slept.
My eyes opened on a beach. I was lying on sand. I stood up and found many girls around in bikinies and playing in water. wow !! But suddenly I saw a girl drowning in sea. The hero in me woke up and I jumped in water to save her. She was unconscious. I carried her to my hotel room and layed her in bed. She opened her eyes "where am I?". "In hotel room baby. I saved you" I replied. She holded my hand and said "Take watever you want". I couldnt believe my eyes. She said again "Wat do you want from me ? Veg ? Non veg ?. You are free. You can take anything" I was about to reply "non-veg" when suddenly ..
Suddenly my eyes opened and I found the air hostess shaking my hand and speaking "Food sir, wat do you want ? Veg or Non-Veg?" I replied "Veg". Finally I landed and took an auto to my society. After I got down from auto and entered the society, I was welcomed by many barking dogs. I wanted to say "its me your old friend. Remember we used to play together ?" After reaching home I rang the bell at 4:45 am. Mom opened the door and I said "Surprise". :) Everybody in house woke up. My cousin brother said "Before you left ahmedabad there were only 4 dogs in society. And now there are 14". I commented "Count again. There will be 15 now".
Sunday, December 24, 2006
Monday, December 11, 2006
Bill Gate's Daughter
aa .. haaan. Don't go by the topic. Its just to tempt you to read this ;) Waise do you think its worth marrying her ? hmm .. could be a millionare in a single day. One could dance around everyday, spend money as if people feel its a rain of dollars. Go for world tours and talk crap with people "windows yeah.. windows woh .. I have this many shares of MS". Would be fun looking at Bill Gates speaking "Jamai raja kaise ho ?" !! You could give crap fundas to him and he ought to silently listen. Just speak anything "windows sucks. Linux is better. Bill, you got to improve the kernel design. Implement concepts like randomization of heap. The stack protection mechanism used in WinXP using security cookies basically sucks. You got to find out something better". All he could do is say "yes, yes". (Though we know he wont implement a bit of it. But would be fun to get a feeling of a ruler over the richest man on planet). However achieving it doesn't seem to be an easy job. It would need to be a smart fellow in order convince his daughter or Bill for marriage. err .. convince Bill to marry his daugther not him. huh.
One of the ways I can think of to achieve it is get a job in Microsoft. Do excellent work there. Try to get into meetings in which Bill is involved and give new fundas and impress. Lets imagine a situation. A meeting is going on with all techies with Bill sitting at the far end of the room very depressed!
Bill: Damm, these hackers have made life miserable. Everyday new virii, new worms, new 0days. We need to come up with a complete security solution to stop this.
Balmer: There is no way out. Linux has taken over us in security and people have started to trust it more than Ms. Its a failure for us.
Rosy: Mr Gates, there is no solution to this since we have already gone far enough in developement of operating system and its impossible for us to go back and redesign a secured architecture.
(Now its my turn. I remind myself of Eminem song "one opportunity, one shot ... ". I tell myself "yes, this is time. Explode. Come on baby get up")
Me: There is a solution !!
(Everyone raises their head and stares at me with widened and puzzled eyes.)
(I stand up to explain staring at the ground and taking few steps towards bill as if thinking deeply and speaking).
"Majority of the problems are related to buffer overflow attacks. We could implement a program which runs at the basic kernel level, beyond which no driver could reach. It could be done having some restrictions in Kernel. This specific program would compare argument lenghts passed to any subroutine and available buffer in the stack and heap. Any arguments with lengths more than buffer size limits would be considered as an attempt to exploit. ... .. ...
...some more blah .. blah ...
...security... breaches... overflows.. hackers ... vulnerabilities ...
...some more blah .. blah ...
(I conclude with my hands banging on the table) I bet nobody in the world could be able to break this system.
(Everyone looking at me as if looking at a sun which rose for first time in life of Microsoft)
Bill: You are genius !! That was an amazing concept. Thatz exactly what I was looking for !!
Balmer: I never believed we could ever beat linux. But implementing this concept it seems we will capture the market.
Rosy: wow!! Player .. wat are you doing this weekend ?
Bill: Would you consider to marry my daughter ? I could also give you 50% of MS shares. We both could bring MS to top.
Me: (showing some attitude) Your offer sounds good. Would it fine if I take some time to ponder on it and get back to you tomorrow ?
oops enough dreams :) Let me eat something for dinner and dig myself back to "False Impression" by Jeffery Archer.
One of the ways I can think of to achieve it is get a job in Microsoft. Do excellent work there. Try to get into meetings in which Bill is involved and give new fundas and impress. Lets imagine a situation. A meeting is going on with all techies with Bill sitting at the far end of the room very depressed!
Bill: Damm, these hackers have made life miserable. Everyday new virii, new worms, new 0days. We need to come up with a complete security solution to stop this.
Balmer: There is no way out. Linux has taken over us in security and people have started to trust it more than Ms. Its a failure for us.
Rosy: Mr Gates, there is no solution to this since we have already gone far enough in developement of operating system and its impossible for us to go back and redesign a secured architecture.
(Now its my turn. I remind myself of Eminem song "one opportunity, one shot ... ". I tell myself "yes, this is time. Explode. Come on baby get up")
Me: There is a solution !!
(Everyone raises their head and stares at me with widened and puzzled eyes.)
(I stand up to explain staring at the ground and taking few steps towards bill as if thinking deeply and speaking).
"Majority of the problems are related to buffer overflow attacks. We could implement a program which runs at the basic kernel level, beyond which no driver could reach. It could be done having some restrictions in Kernel. This specific program would compare argument lenghts passed to any subroutine and available buffer in the stack and heap. Any arguments with lengths more than buffer size limits would be considered as an attempt to exploit. ...
...some more blah .. blah ...
...security... breaches... overflows.. hackers ... vulnerabilities ...
...some more blah .. blah ...
(I conclude with my hands banging on the table) I bet nobody in the world could be able to break this system.
(Everyone looking at me as if looking at a sun which rose for first time in life of Microsoft)
Bill: You are genius !! That was an amazing concept. Thatz exactly what I was looking for !!
Balmer: I never believed we could ever beat linux. But implementing this concept it seems we will capture the market.
Rosy: wow!! Player .. wat are you doing this weekend ?
Bill: Would you consider to marry my daughter ? I could also give you 50% of MS shares. We both could bring MS to top.
Me: (showing some attitude) Your offer sounds good. Would it fine if I take some time to ponder on it and get back to you tomorrow ?
oops enough dreams :) Let me eat something for dinner and dig myself back to "False Impression" by Jeffery Archer.
Monday, December 4, 2006
Riot Experience
Imagine an innocent man being showered with kerosene by a group of slayers. His charred body running on open street with a fearful scream, crying for help. Well it’s not a nightmare but a reality which still can be seen in India during riots. Pune was under curfew for two days due to disturbances in some parts of the city. It’s not just Pune, but whole Maharashtra experienced the panic.
The memories of 2002 Gujarat riots flashed back before me. I was in second year of college pursuing the Engineering Degree. There was a college bus which picked us up from Ahmadabad and traveled 120 kms till college. The bus used to travel through few sensitive parts of the city.
It was one pleasant morning, we were traveling listening to radio mirchi and unaware of what massacre had occurred at previous midnight in a particular area. The road was traffic less and the street was waking up because of the sound of bus. People were gazing at the bus as if it contained 100 assassins. The driver felt the sensitiveness of the situation and switched off the radio. Students in terror were looking out of window wishing everything would go fine. However it didn’t!
The bus suddenly came to halt. Students inside the bus felt a thin shiver in their body. I was sitting on the last seat as always. Three muscular dark colored men entered the bus barking out slogans. A commanding voice, from one of them, demanded everyone to be seated and not to say a word. It was complete silence which broke with the foot steps of one of those religious fighters. He had a huge knife, almost equal to a sword, in his right hand held tight up in the air. His left hand had curved strong and big fingers as if looking for a neck to hold and cut it off with sword. Who would be that victim? Me? Anyone else? Or all?!!! The deeper he entered in the bus, more did the students tremble. It was a night mare to imagine the touch of a thin lined sharp sword on the neck. As he came nearer to the last seat, where I was sitting, I could see a tiny drop of red liquid trying to escape from sword and fall down. Was it blood? (off course duh) . However, I bet he didn’t require a sword to kill anyone. His fearful red eyes throwing fire balls were enough to kill anyone with terror. After reaching at the end of bus, he glanced at each one of us sitting on the last seat. The moments were terrifying since we never knew which one would be the last moment of our life. However, when he felt that none of us is harmful, he turned to go back. It was then an idiot college mate “N”, sitting on second last seat tried to act over smart and spoke loudly “Jai Ramji ki”.
The beast turned back! He stared at “N” for seconds as if a lion watching his prey waiting for the right time to attack. “N” realized his mistake, curved his body and tried to move a little towards the window. “T” sitting beside “N” seemed as if would die of fear even if someone suddenly touched him. I felt my throat to have jammed and couldn’t swallow the saliva. However, due to god’s grace, the giant broke his contact of eyes with “N” and went straight back to the driver. He had a small chat with the driver who explained that we were college students. The religious fighter directed him the safe way to move out the area and in 1.5 hours we were in college sharing the terrifying experience with others.
The memories of 2002 Gujarat riots flashed back before me. I was in second year of college pursuing the Engineering Degree. There was a college bus which picked us up from Ahmadabad and traveled 120 kms till college. The bus used to travel through few sensitive parts of the city.
It was one pleasant morning, we were traveling listening to radio mirchi and unaware of what massacre had occurred at previous midnight in a particular area. The road was traffic less and the street was waking up because of the sound of bus. People were gazing at the bus as if it contained 100 assassins. The driver felt the sensitiveness of the situation and switched off the radio. Students in terror were looking out of window wishing everything would go fine. However it didn’t!
The bus suddenly came to halt. Students inside the bus felt a thin shiver in their body. I was sitting on the last seat as always. Three muscular dark colored men entered the bus barking out slogans. A commanding voice, from one of them, demanded everyone to be seated and not to say a word. It was complete silence which broke with the foot steps of one of those religious fighters. He had a huge knife, almost equal to a sword, in his right hand held tight up in the air. His left hand had curved strong and big fingers as if looking for a neck to hold and cut it off with sword. Who would be that victim? Me? Anyone else? Or all?!!! The deeper he entered in the bus, more did the students tremble. It was a night mare to imagine the touch of a thin lined sharp sword on the neck. As he came nearer to the last seat, where I was sitting, I could see a tiny drop of red liquid trying to escape from sword and fall down. Was it blood? (off course duh) . However, I bet he didn’t require a sword to kill anyone. His fearful red eyes throwing fire balls were enough to kill anyone with terror. After reaching at the end of bus, he glanced at each one of us sitting on the last seat. The moments were terrifying since we never knew which one would be the last moment of our life. However, when he felt that none of us is harmful, he turned to go back. It was then an idiot college mate “N”, sitting on second last seat tried to act over smart and spoke loudly “Jai Ramji ki”.
The beast turned back! He stared at “N” for seconds as if a lion watching his prey waiting for the right time to attack. “N” realized his mistake, curved his body and tried to move a little towards the window. “T” sitting beside “N” seemed as if would die of fear even if someone suddenly touched him. I felt my throat to have jammed and couldn’t swallow the saliva. However, due to god’s grace, the giant broke his contact of eyes with “N” and went straight back to the driver. He had a small chat with the driver who explained that we were college students. The religious fighter directed him the safe way to move out the area and in 1.5 hours we were in college sharing the terrifying experience with others.
Saturday, December 2, 2006
Friday Night
Its friday night (yuppeeeee ..), however me still sitting in office. Just completed the work. Have good plans after going home. hmm ... hope the room mates plan a night out in apache (My favourite place). For those who are not from pune, lemme tell you apache is not that opensource webserver. But its a PUB !! Playing all my favourite rock songs (including Rammstein). Man you should see "S" and me head banging, while "SL" just drinking and thinking "pagal sale peene aate hai ki dance karne". Watever he thinks is actually true. Rock songs se bhi nasha chadta hai. Ask "S". Many times in Apache I close my eyes listening to drumb beats and shake hand and leg with it. And then open my eyes to see "S" and "SL" laughing at me. They say i got a typical funny style of shaking my hand (offcourse not the way you dirty minds think. Its different. You got to see me for it). Many times the waiter comes and keeps shouting "sir bill !!" Par sunega kaun ? All are busy head banging on Du Hast like a mad woman infected with ghost shaking around with all her hair spread out! I can feel all blood vessels in body running in a race to get first. heart pumping like a time bomb which could explode any moment. Pulses getting widened and widended as if they would tear the skin and come out! Mind completely in sync with drum beats and heart whispering "come on get up, kick out that guy sitting with a blonde on next table and take her along." (offcourse i dont do that par dil to dil hai. It doesnt know wat is good or bad). Rock songs make me feel "forget the world, forget rules, believe in youself and do watever your heart says" !! I hope to write a blog once while sitting in apache to express the complete feeling i get at that moment.
Now coming back to my cube in office. I have to go home in auto now. I have already missed the bus. There is no company too. Sometimes a tamilian girl "M" comes along with me since she lives in a place nearby. All she can speak in hindi is "Maska mat karo bhaiya"!!! Some stupid idiot girls taught her this line. (Dont know why many girls make me bhaiya ??? ) I taught her few hindi words too. Like if you wanna say "you are good" then say "tum nalayak ho". After sweating a lot I finally corrected her pronouncation. But woh kehte hai naa "meri billi mujse mew". Harroj aake wo mujhi ko yeah sentence sunati thi. Anyways in return I had asked her "What do we say to a beautiful girl in tamil?" She replied "Akka" I noted it and used it many times. It was quite late when my room mate "A" (that Coimbture guy) told me it means "elder sister" !!!
My transport medium to home is a company bus till one stop and then auto from there to home. Auto se yaad aaya. I had once met a drunkard auto guy. While driving he was speaking "yeah auto chalana toh logo ki seva hai !! Mein kamane ke liye thoda chalata hoon ? Jindagi mein aaj tak kabhi meine kisiko kahi bhi jaane ke liye 'naa' nahi kaha. Baaki sab auto wale sale kamine hote hai. Meter se ek rupiya bhi kabhi jyada nahi liya meine ! Mein yeah mein woh ..." I was like kaafi dharmatma aadmi hai. (Generally I get impressed by people pretty fast like that dog whom if you serve just a chapati, would get ready to die for you) When my stop came I saw a sudden personality change in that autowala ... like a rocket shot up suddenly takes a "U" turn running back to you with full speed. His mouth explodes 50 Rs for meter showing clearly 30. I am like who would like to take panga with a drunkard and hand him watever it amount is. Just the place where I got down there was a lady requesting to same autowala "Shivajinagar chaloge ?" I could feel my eyeballs rolling around when that autowala anounced "chal hut" and rode off !
Now coming back to my cube in office. I have to go home in auto now. I have already missed the bus. There is no company too. Sometimes a tamilian girl "M" comes along with me since she lives in a place nearby. All she can speak in hindi is "Maska mat karo bhaiya"!!! Some stupid idiot girls taught her this line. (Dont know why many girls make me bhaiya ??? ) I taught her few hindi words too. Like if you wanna say "you are good" then say "tum nalayak ho". After sweating a lot I finally corrected her pronouncation. But woh kehte hai naa "meri billi mujse mew". Harroj aake wo mujhi ko yeah sentence sunati thi. Anyways in return I had asked her "What do we say to a beautiful girl in tamil?" She replied "Akka" I noted it and used it many times. It was quite late when my room mate "A" (that Coimbture guy) told me it means "elder sister" !!!
My transport medium to home is a company bus till one stop and then auto from there to home. Auto se yaad aaya. I had once met a drunkard auto guy. While driving he was speaking "yeah auto chalana toh logo ki seva hai !! Mein kamane ke liye thoda chalata hoon ? Jindagi mein aaj tak kabhi meine kisiko kahi bhi jaane ke liye 'naa' nahi kaha. Baaki sab auto wale sale kamine hote hai. Meter se ek rupiya bhi kabhi jyada nahi liya meine ! Mein yeah mein woh ..." I was like kaafi dharmatma aadmi hai. (Generally I get impressed by people pretty fast like that dog whom if you serve just a chapati, would get ready to die for you) When my stop came I saw a sudden personality change in that autowala ... like a rocket shot up suddenly takes a "U" turn running back to you with full speed. His mouth explodes 50 Rs for meter showing clearly 30. I am like who would like to take panga with a drunkard and hand him watever it amount is. Just the place where I got down there was a lady requesting to same autowala "Shivajinagar chaloge ?" I could feel my eyeballs rolling around when that autowala anounced "chal hut" and rode off !
Thursday, November 30, 2006
College Days
hmm.. realy dont know what I am gonna write today in this blog. But I think writing blog is really useful. Read somewhere that writing about ourself releaves us from stress. Seems very true. But sometimes this writing could turn to be bad for others who are in touch with us. Kahi galti se unke bare kuch ulta sidha likh diya aur pol khol di then everyone is going to read about it. Like my room mate "S" has already disclosed much of myself in his blog. Kaafi josh mein aake. Actually he stays with me so he understands me very well ... right from my chadi banyaan life of house to smart handsome programmer of a multinational company (waise hun to nahi lekin sentence ko thoda set karne ke liye smart handsome likh diya ;) ). Waise bhi ******** mein job milna aasan to nahi. Par mil gayee. And many of classmates got there eye balls almost spring out when they came to know about it. Actually i never used to study in my college life. It would be interesting to see all my classmates doing revision one hour before the exam and me sitting in internet lab checking out an "i love you" mail. Which actually turns out to be a virus!!
Waise college ki baat aa hi gayi hai then lemme tell you how it was. Many students used to sit and listen carefully to those boring "software engineering life cyle" type of lectures. And we last benchers used to discuss about motor cycles. Sometimes bunk lectures and sit in canteens or internet labs. Create an id for some madam and send mails to lecturers with messages "I have unsaid feelings for you". And vice versa. Then laugh next day looking at expressions of those two.
However, the virus, vulnerabilities, exploits, programming interest atleast took me to get a job in ********. Otherwise pata nahi may be I would be sitting in some CMM level 5 firm and doing testing or dragging some text boxes, buttons into some gui based forms. QA would be shouting "yeah textbox ki size 11 kyu hai ? Client 10 bola hai to 10 hi ho chahiye. Bug file karta hun. Change kar lena." And me thinking "kaash aaj chakku mere hath mein hota to tl, pl, bl, ... jitne bhi 'l' hai sabka sir kat lun aur Hanibal ki tarah unko fry karke khaa jao" But thank god thatz not the case.
Achha match is going on right now. Yesterday news said Sehwag is captian for today since dravid is injured and wont play. (Dravid emotionally injured ? ) Anyways agar dravid hoga nahi then who is going to play ? Ek wahi to tha jo atleast 30-40 run banake out hota tha and India would atleast cross 100. But interesting thing is wat sehwag said to press yesterday "Pressure tab hai jab mujhe lagta hai ki pressure hai. Agar mujhe pressure nahi lagta to pressure nahi hai. " Kya baat kahi hai yaar. How much control he has naa. I think he wont be having much problem sitting in bathroom every morning because he has complete control on his pressure.
Another news is that court has ordered munnabhai to shift his place to jail. Shoot ... man i was expecting his next movie to be "Munnabhai Software Engg" !! What a scene would it be when circuit would be pointing a gun on QA and giving a dhamki saying "jyada khich khich nahi mangta. Bhai ke software mein ek bhi hole nikala to tere bheje mein hole kar dunga". What a movie yaar. Munnabhai falling in love with his TL.
Waise college ki baat aa hi gayi hai then lemme tell you how it was. Many students used to sit and listen carefully to those boring "software engineering life cyle" type of lectures. And we last benchers used to discuss about motor cycles. Sometimes bunk lectures and sit in canteens or internet labs. Create an id for some madam and send mails to lecturers with messages "I have unsaid feelings for you". And vice versa. Then laugh next day looking at expressions of those two.
However, the virus, vulnerabilities, exploits, programming interest atleast took me to get a job in ********. Otherwise pata nahi may be I would be sitting in some CMM level 5 firm and doing testing or dragging some text boxes, buttons into some gui based forms. QA would be shouting "yeah textbox ki size 11 kyu hai ? Client 10 bola hai to 10 hi ho chahiye. Bug file karta hun. Change kar lena." And me thinking "kaash aaj chakku mere hath mein hota to tl, pl, bl, ... jitne bhi 'l' hai sabka sir kat lun aur Hanibal ki tarah unko fry karke khaa jao" But thank god thatz not the case.
Achha match is going on right now. Yesterday news said Sehwag is captian for today since dravid is injured and wont play. (Dravid emotionally injured ? ) Anyways agar dravid hoga nahi then who is going to play ? Ek wahi to tha jo atleast 30-40 run banake out hota tha and India would atleast cross 100. But interesting thing is wat sehwag said to press yesterday "Pressure tab hai jab mujhe lagta hai ki pressure hai. Agar mujhe pressure nahi lagta to pressure nahi hai. " Kya baat kahi hai yaar. How much control he has naa. I think he wont be having much problem sitting in bathroom every morning because he has complete control on his pressure.
Another news is that court has ordered munnabhai to shift his place to jail. Shoot ... man i was expecting his next movie to be "Munnabhai Software Engg" !! What a scene would it be when circuit would be pointing a gun on QA and giving a dhamki saying "jyada khich khich nahi mangta. Bhai ke software mein ek bhi hole nikala to tere bheje mein hole kar dunga". What a movie yaar. Munnabhai falling in love with his TL.
Tuesday, November 28, 2006
Ants roaming on Tiles
Long beard, uncombed hair and a poor jeans which hasnt been washed since a week. That was my look when I was sitting on a stone waiting for office bus today. Next to me about 10 feet away was a girl talking on phone. Was she really talking on phone or pretending to be just to avoid me ? No i dont think she was talking on phone because 50% of time she was looking at me while talking. Could be two reasons 1) either because I looked handsome 2) or because of my dirty look, thinking "pata nahi kaise kaise log company mein recruit ho jate hai. Itni bhi tamiz nahi ki software engineer ho yaar. Kuch achhi tarah se decent ho ke aao" Second one seems to be more correct. I tried to concentrate on few ants roaming around on the tiles. Don't know what they were searching for because my eyes were on ants but a needle in my mind was pointed to that girl wearing white top and blue jeans with cute specs like that pretty zinta look in Kal ho na ho. However everything got shattered with the arrival of bus which made feel releaved. However that was not all. I stood up to get down when my stop came. But that stupid driver suddenly put on his foot on brake so hard that I almost fell with my bag falling on that pretty zinta. Did that driver do it intentionally ? I guess so because he was laughing along with other people in bus.
This reminds me of my school days when few tiny grass had started sprouting on my upper lip. I used to travel in local buses to goto school. School cum college with lots of beautiful faces. I always wished some day the driver would put brakes hard enough so that any of those college flowers would lose balance and fall on me. But it never happened. Yeah it did happen that a fat guy, completely sweat in a 45 degree C temperature of ahmedabad, lost his balance and broke my specs making me flat.
I am still cursing that school friend who gave me the adult knowledge and made me realize that an opposite gender is something special. It had started making me feel ashamed to even talk with them and took time to come out of all that. Is it that Mallika Sherawat is really seductive ? Or is it a hype created among people. How happy would be that pilot who got divorsed from her ? How happy would be that dad who stopped talking with her daughter for taking up murder kinda films ? Whatever, who cares :D A software engineer's life is to write algorithms for something like those ants finding path to its destination roaming on square tiles.
This reminds me of my school days when few tiny grass had started sprouting on my upper lip. I used to travel in local buses to goto school. School cum college with lots of beautiful faces. I always wished some day the driver would put brakes hard enough so that any of those college flowers would lose balance and fall on me. But it never happened. Yeah it did happen that a fat guy, completely sweat in a 45 degree C temperature of ahmedabad, lost his balance and broke my specs making me flat.
I am still cursing that school friend who gave me the adult knowledge and made me realize that an opposite gender is something special. It had started making me feel ashamed to even talk with them and took time to come out of all that. Is it that Mallika Sherawat is really seductive ? Or is it a hype created among people. How happy would be that pilot who got divorsed from her ? How happy would be that dad who stopped talking with her daughter for taking up murder kinda films ? Whatever, who cares :D A software engineer's life is to write algorithms for something like those ants finding path to its destination roaming on square tiles.
Monday, November 27, 2006
Orkuting !
"Hey, coming for hair-cut?" One of my room mates "S" shouted. I had a hair cut a week before. Still went along with him to give company. After he came out of saloon I asked him "you dint have a hair cut yet ??" "Its already cut man. Its new style !!" And then he exploded "Lets go home and you can take my pic. I want to put it in orkut !!" Shoot !
People have become orkut crazy these days. Its an addictive disease spreading all around. "S" comes back home from office and first thing he does is checks orkut. orkut karte karte so jaata hai. Next day morning first thing he does after get up is check orkut! Itna hi nahi usne meri ek chadi banyaan wali pic bhi apne album mein dal di. With comments "Extreme exposure of nudity" Hope poeple dont take it in a wrong way. Waise orkut ki aadat to mujhe bhi lag gayi hai. Hamari orkut college community mein jao to bas yahi threads dikhenge -> "Slap the person above you for any funny reason", "hug the person above you" "shoot the person above u" .... Usme se 25% threads to mein hi create kiye hue hai. My other room mate "AKR" finds "S" and me to have gone mad. He says "in dono ko pata nahi kya mazaa aaata hai orkut mein. Kisi ladki ne 'hi' bol diya to usko harroj 'gm, gn, good afternoon' ke bina matlab ke message bhejte rahenge !"
Aaj phir cricket mein india haar ne waali hai. We stopped watching cricket now. Just have a look at score at regular intervals of 2-3 hours. India ki dhulai dekhi nahi jaati :D It seems indian players have forgot how to bat. Waise ek baat mujhe aaj tak kha rahi hai ki itna bada india hai. Itne saari jan sankhya hai. How come they havent been able to find one single good allrounder ? Aamir khan ki team shayad isse achha khel legi.
Tomorrow Monday again. Coding starts again. I can see feel myself digging back into those codes with many "if" loops, "while" loops, starting closing brackets. BUGS !!! Sometimes i feel, cant we create some smart softwares which create softwares themselves. We just need to give it an input and desired output. And it should be capable enough to design all algorithms and implement it. Kitni sahi life hoti naa. Softwares making other softwares, softwares making hardwares, softwares working for us in the way we want. Could give us a godly feeling! Yeah yeah some of you now must be saying "asshole wat if those smart softwares start controlling human beings ??" May be they already are. May be the matrix movie is true and each one of us is programmed. I might be programmed to write a blog right now. And you to read this crap that I am writing. But at the end of the day who cares ? :D Life goes on ;)
People have become orkut crazy these days. Its an addictive disease spreading all around. "S" comes back home from office and first thing he does is checks orkut. orkut karte karte so jaata hai. Next day morning first thing he does after get up is check orkut! Itna hi nahi usne meri ek chadi banyaan wali pic bhi apne album mein dal di. With comments "Extreme exposure of nudity" Hope poeple dont take it in a wrong way. Waise orkut ki aadat to mujhe bhi lag gayi hai. Hamari orkut college community mein jao to bas yahi threads dikhenge -> "Slap the person above you for any funny reason", "hug the person above you" "shoot the person above u" .... Usme se 25% threads to mein hi create kiye hue hai. My other room mate "AKR" finds "S" and me to have gone mad. He says "in dono ko pata nahi kya mazaa aaata hai orkut mein. Kisi ladki ne 'hi' bol diya to usko harroj 'gm, gn, good afternoon' ke bina matlab ke message bhejte rahenge !"
Aaj phir cricket mein india haar ne waali hai. We stopped watching cricket now. Just have a look at score at regular intervals of 2-3 hours. India ki dhulai dekhi nahi jaati :D It seems indian players have forgot how to bat. Waise ek baat mujhe aaj tak kha rahi hai ki itna bada india hai. Itne saari jan sankhya hai. How come they havent been able to find one single good allrounder ? Aamir khan ki team shayad isse achha khel legi.
Tomorrow Monday again. Coding starts again. I can see feel myself digging back into those codes with many "if" loops, "while" loops, starting closing brackets. BUGS !!! Sometimes i feel, cant we create some smart softwares which create softwares themselves. We just need to give it an input and desired output. And it should be capable enough to design all algorithms and implement it. Kitni sahi life hoti naa. Softwares making other softwares, softwares making hardwares, softwares working for us in the way we want. Could give us a godly feeling! Yeah yeah some of you now must be saying "asshole wat if those smart softwares start controlling human beings ??" May be they already are. May be the matrix movie is true and each one of us is programmed. I might be programmed to write a blog right now. And you to read this crap that I am writing. But at the end of the day who cares ? :D Life goes on ;)
Sunday, November 26, 2006
ladki wadki !!
A hectic week with lods of work. What a life of a software engineer!! Work 5 days and enjoy sat/sunday. However something interesting happened this week. Mom called and said "beta ek ladki kaa rishta aaya hai. Achhi padhi likhi ladki hai. tumhe ab shaadi karni hai naa .." Boom !! I was like "no mom not now. After 3-4 years I will think abt it." The previous generation find it very surprising to see the new generation people not interested in getting married. Whenever I goto village grandmom says "beta meri jindagi kaa kya bharosa. Hum upar pahonche usse pehle shaadi karle." Probably its the same case wid everybody's life.
Just imagine a case of today's generation. Guy ABC is talking with his friend XYZ.
ABC: yaar, Gharwalo ne mere liye ek ladki dekhi hai. Software engg hai. Infosys mein kaam karti hai.
XYZ: aay haay beta sahi hai. photu botu dikha.
ABC: Here it is. (Shows him the pic)
XYZ: Abey iske saath to mein date pe gaya tha !!!
ABC: what !!
Hota hai hota hai. Today's generation is different. And what to say about people who have migrated to foriegn countries. I remember one incident when I had travelled to Canada. A girl hit me by mistake unknowingly while walking. And she said "sorry". I replied "its ok no problem". She then holded my hand and shoulder and said "I am really very very sorry". I was like "its ok. its fine. No problem". She again repeated. Arey yaar sorry kehne ke liye itna chipakne ki kyaa jaroorat hai ?? If it would be india, the woman shout "andhe dikhta nahi kya ?" Even if it would be her mistake she would blame us. Still today all indian husbands have been asking themselves this question "How in hell is that I always turn out to be wrong. And my wife is always right !!"
Anyways, lets become serious now. Its a dog eat dog world. A person learns a lot after coming in co-orporate life. World is not as rosy at it seems. Cat eats mice, Dog eats cat and a lion eats dog. In jungle atleast everything is visible. But in human world, people get exploited without even their knowledge. People think something different, speak something else and act something out of the blue !!
Just imagine a case of today's generation. Guy ABC is talking with his friend XYZ.
ABC: yaar, Gharwalo ne mere liye ek ladki dekhi hai. Software engg hai. Infosys mein kaam karti hai.
XYZ: aay haay beta sahi hai. photu botu dikha.
ABC: Here it is. (Shows him the pic)
XYZ: Abey iske saath to mein date pe gaya tha !!!
ABC: what !!
Hota hai hota hai. Today's generation is different. And what to say about people who have migrated to foriegn countries. I remember one incident when I had travelled to Canada. A girl hit me by mistake unknowingly while walking. And she said "sorry". I replied "its ok no problem". She then holded my hand and shoulder and said "I am really very very sorry". I was like "its ok. its fine. No problem". She again repeated. Arey yaar sorry kehne ke liye itna chipakne ki kyaa jaroorat hai ?? If it would be india, the woman shout "andhe dikhta nahi kya ?" Even if it would be her mistake she would blame us. Still today all indian husbands have been asking themselves this question "How in hell is that I always turn out to be wrong. And my wife is always right !!"
Anyways, lets become serious now. Its a dog eat dog world. A person learns a lot after coming in co-orporate life. World is not as rosy at it seems. Cat eats mice, Dog eats cat and a lion eats dog. In jungle atleast everything is visible. But in human world, people get exploited without even their knowledge. People think something different, speak something else and act something out of the blue !!
Monday, November 20, 2006
Man Eaters !!
damm, sala sunday itna boring hai. I thought lemme write one more blog. All three of my room mates have gone to mumbai. Just waiting for them to come back so that I can feel life again. But before they come I got to clean up mess I created in past 2 days. 'A' is the buddy who shares his room with me. This guy A from Coimboture is a real clean guy. His books, bed, clothes, almari .. all things neat and clean and in their place. Or in other words you could describe him as an ideal Indian husband about whom every typical indian girl would dream of !!!
Aaj socha chalo time pass karne movie dekhte hai. I bought "Hannibal" from crossword, ordered pizza and coke and sat for watching. Saala mein yaha pizza kha raha tha aur Anthony waha insaano ko kha raha tha. The scene in which anthony fries brain of a guy was interesting. Arey yaar, kisi ka deemag khana ho to chappu, tawa, aag ki kya jaroorat hai ? Just making him sit in any college lecture would be enuf!! Waise agar soche ki insaano ko khana allowed hota then how would be the world. People would goto restro and order "ek insani khoon ki dal, ek plate insaan ki aankh aur 3 insaani chamde ki roti !!!" chicken farmhouse ki tarah insaano ke farmhouse hote !! ooooooo...
Aaj socha chalo time pass karne movie dekhte hai. I bought "Hannibal" from crossword, ordered pizza and coke and sat for watching. Saala mein yaha pizza kha raha tha aur Anthony waha insaano ko kha raha tha. The scene in which anthony fries brain of a guy was interesting. Arey yaar, kisi ka deemag khana ho to chappu, tawa, aag ki kya jaroorat hai ? Just making him sit in any college lecture would be enuf!! Waise agar soche ki insaano ko khana allowed hota then how would be the world. People would goto restro and order "ek insani khoon ki dal, ek plate insaan ki aankh aur 3 insaani chamde ki roti !!!" chicken farmhouse ki tarah insaano ke farmhouse hote !! ooooooo...
Life is a Game
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