College Days

hmm.. realy dont know what I am gonna write today in this blog. But I think writing blog is really useful. Read somewhere that writing about ourself releaves us from stress. Seems very true. But sometimes this writing could turn to be bad for others who are in touch with us. Kahi galti se unke bare kuch ulta sidha likh diya aur pol khol di then everyone is going to read about it. Like my room mate "S" has already disclosed much of myself in his blog. Kaafi josh mein aake. Actually he stays with me so he understands me very well ... right from my chadi banyaan life of house to smart handsome programmer of a multinational company (waise hun to nahi lekin sentence ko thoda set karne ke liye smart handsome likh diya ;) ). Waise bhi ******** mein job milna aasan to nahi. Par mil gayee. And many of classmates got there eye balls almost spring out when they came to know about it. Actually i never used to study in my college life. It would be interesting to see all my classmates doing revision one hour before the exam and me sitting in internet lab checking out an "i love you" mail. Which actually turns out to be a virus!!

Waise college ki baat aa hi gayi hai then lemme tell you how it was. Many students used to sit and listen carefully to those boring "software engineering life cyle" type of lectures. And we last benchers used to discuss about motor cycles. Sometimes bunk lectures and sit in canteens or internet labs. Create an id for some madam and send mails to lecturers with messages "I have unsaid feelings for you". And vice versa. Then laugh next day looking at expressions of those two.

However, the virus, vulnerabilities, exploits, programming interest atleast took me to get a job in ********. Otherwise pata nahi may be I would be sitting in some CMM level 5 firm and doing testing or dragging some text boxes, buttons into some gui based forms. QA would be shouting "yeah textbox ki size 11 kyu hai ? Client 10 bola hai to 10 hi ho chahiye. Bug file karta hun. Change kar lena." And me thinking "kaash aaj chakku mere hath mein hota to tl, pl, bl, ... jitne bhi 'l' hai sabka sir kat lun aur Hanibal ki tarah unko fry karke khaa jao" But thank god thatz not the case.

Achha match is going on right now. Yesterday news said Sehwag is captian for today since dravid is injured and wont play. (Dravid emotionally injured ? ) Anyways agar dravid hoga nahi then who is going to play ? Ek wahi to tha jo atleast 30-40 run banake out hota tha and India would atleast cross 100. But interesting thing is wat sehwag said to press yesterday "Pressure tab hai jab mujhe lagta hai ki pressure hai. Agar mujhe pressure nahi lagta to pressure nahi hai. " Kya baat kahi hai yaar. How much control he has naa. I think he wont be having much problem sitting in bathroom every morning because he has complete control on his pressure.

Another news is that court has ordered munnabhai to shift his place to jail. Shoot ... man i was expecting his next movie to be "Munnabhai Software Engg" !! What a scene would it be when circuit would be pointing a gun on QA and giving a dhamki saying "jyada khich khich nahi mangta. Bhai ke software mein ek bhi hole nikala to tere bheje mein hole kar dunga". What a movie yaar. Munnabhai falling in love with his TL.

Ants roaming on Tiles

Long beard, uncombed hair and a poor jeans which hasnt been washed since a week. That was my look when I was sitting on a stone waiting for office bus today. Next to me about 10 feet away was a girl talking on phone. Was she really talking on phone or pretending to be just to avoid me ? No i dont think she was talking on phone because 50% of time she was looking at me while talking. Could be two reasons 1) either because I looked handsome 2) or because of my dirty look, thinking "pata nahi kaise kaise log company mein recruit ho jate hai. Itni bhi tamiz nahi ki software engineer ho yaar. Kuch achhi tarah se decent ho ke aao" Second one seems to be more correct. I tried to concentrate on few ants roaming around on the tiles. Don't know what they were searching for because my eyes were on ants but a needle in my mind was pointed to that girl wearing white top and blue jeans with cute specs like that pretty zinta look in Kal ho na ho. However everything got shattered with the arrival of bus which made feel releaved. However that was not all. I stood up to get down when my stop came. But that stupid driver suddenly put on his foot on brake so hard that I almost fell with my bag falling on that pretty zinta. Did that driver do it intentionally ? I guess so because he was laughing along with other people in bus.

This reminds me of my school days when few tiny grass had started sprouting on my upper lip. I used to travel in local buses to goto school. School cum college with lots of beautiful faces. I always wished some day the driver would put brakes hard enough so that any of those college flowers would lose balance and fall on me. But it never happened. Yeah it did happen that a fat guy, completely sweat in a 45 degree C temperature of ahmedabad, lost his balance and broke my specs making me flat.

I am still cursing that school friend who gave me the adult knowledge and made me realize that an opposite gender is something special. It had started making me feel ashamed to even talk with them and took time to come out of all that. Is it that Mallika Sherawat is really seductive ? Or is it a hype created among people. How happy would be that pilot who got divorsed from her ? How happy would be that dad who stopped talking with her daughter for taking up murder kinda films ? Whatever, who cares :D A software engineer's life is to write algorithms for something like those ants finding path to its destination roaming on square tiles.

Orkuting !

"Hey, coming for hair-cut?" One of my room mates "S" shouted. I had a hair cut a week before. Still went along with him to give company. After he came out of saloon I asked him "you dint have a hair cut yet ??" "Its already cut man. Its new style !!" And then he exploded "Lets go home and you can take my pic. I want to put it in orkut !!" Shoot !

People have become orkut crazy these days. Its an addictive disease spreading all around. "S" comes back home from office and first thing he does is checks orkut. orkut karte karte so jaata hai. Next day morning first thing he does after get up is check orkut! Itna hi nahi usne meri ek chadi banyaan wali pic bhi apne album mein dal di. With comments "Extreme exposure of nudity" Hope poeple dont take it in a wrong way. Waise orkut ki aadat to mujhe bhi lag gayi hai. Hamari orkut college community mein jao to bas yahi threads dikhenge -> "Slap the person above you for any funny reason", "hug the person above you" "shoot the person above u" .... Usme se 25% threads to mein hi create kiye hue hai. My other room mate "AKR" finds "S" and me to have gone mad. He says "in dono ko pata nahi kya mazaa aaata hai orkut mein. Kisi ladki ne 'hi' bol diya to usko harroj 'gm, gn, good afternoon' ke bina matlab ke message bhejte rahenge !"

Aaj phir cricket mein india haar ne waali hai. We stopped watching cricket now. Just have a look at score at regular intervals of 2-3 hours. India ki dhulai dekhi nahi jaati :D It seems indian players have forgot how to bat. Waise ek baat mujhe aaj tak kha rahi hai ki itna bada india hai. Itne saari jan sankhya hai. How come they havent been able to find one single good allrounder ? Aamir khan ki team shayad isse achha khel legi.

Tomorrow Monday again. Coding starts again. I can see feel myself digging back into those codes with many "if" loops, "while" loops, starting closing brackets. BUGS !!! Sometimes i feel, cant we create some smart softwares which create softwares themselves. We just need to give it an input and desired output. And it should be capable enough to design all algorithms and implement it. Kitni sahi life hoti naa. Softwares making other softwares, softwares making hardwares, softwares working for us in the way we want. Could give us a godly feeling! Yeah yeah some of you now must be saying "asshole wat if those smart softwares start controlling human beings ??" May be they already are. May be the matrix movie is true and each one of us is programmed. I might be programmed to write a blog right now. And you to read this crap that I am writing. But at the end of the day who cares ? :D Life goes on ;)

ladki wadki !!

A hectic week with lods of work. What a life of a software engineer!! Work 5 days and enjoy sat/sunday. However something interesting happened this week. Mom called and said "beta ek ladki kaa rishta aaya hai. Achhi padhi likhi ladki hai. tumhe ab shaadi karni hai naa .." Boom !! I was like "no mom not now. After 3-4 years I will think abt it." The previous generation find it very surprising to see the new generation people not interested in getting married. Whenever I goto village grandmom says "beta meri jindagi kaa kya bharosa. Hum upar pahonche usse pehle shaadi karle." Probably its the same case wid everybody's life.

Just imagine a case of today's generation. Guy ABC is talking with his friend XYZ.

ABC: yaar, Gharwalo ne mere liye ek ladki dekhi hai. Software engg hai. Infosys mein kaam karti hai.
XYZ: aay haay beta sahi hai. photu botu dikha.
ABC: Here it is. (Shows him the pic)
XYZ: Abey iske saath to mein date pe gaya tha !!!
ABC: what !!

Hota hai hota hai. Today's generation is different. And what to say about people who have migrated to foriegn countries. I remember one incident when I had travelled to Canada. A girl hit me by mistake unknowingly while walking. And she said "sorry". I replied "its ok no problem". She then holded my hand and shoulder and said "I am really very very sorry". I was like "its ok. its fine. No problem". She again repeated. Arey yaar sorry kehne ke liye itna chipakne ki kyaa jaroorat hai ?? If it would be india, the woman shout "andhe dikhta nahi kya ?" Even if it would be her mistake she would blame us. Still today all indian husbands have been asking themselves this question "How in hell is that I always turn out to be wrong. And my wife is always right !!"

Anyways, lets become serious now. Its a dog eat dog world. A person learns a lot after coming in co-orporate life. World is not as rosy at it seems. Cat eats mice, Dog eats cat and a lion eats dog. In jungle atleast everything is visible. But in human world, people get exploited without even their knowledge. People think something different, speak something else and act something out of the blue !!

Man Eaters !!

damm, sala sunday itna boring hai. I thought lemme write one more blog. All three of my room mates have gone to mumbai. Just waiting for them to come back so that I can feel life again. But before they come I got to clean up mess I created in past 2 days. 'A' is the buddy who shares his room with me. This guy A from Coimboture is a real clean guy. His books, bed, clothes, almari .. all things neat and clean and in their place. Or in other words you could describe him as an ideal Indian husband about whom every typical indian girl would dream of !!!

Aaj socha chalo time pass karne movie dekhte hai. I bought "Hannibal" from crossword, ordered pizza and coke and sat for watching. Saala mein yaha pizza kha raha tha aur Anthony waha insaano ko kha raha tha. The scene in which anthony fries brain of a guy was interesting. Arey yaar, kisi ka deemag khana ho to chappu, tawa, aag ki kya jaroorat hai ? Just making him sit in any college lecture would be enuf!! Waise agar soche ki insaano ko khana allowed hota then how would be the world. People would goto restro and order "ek insani khoon ki dal, ek plate insaan ki aankh aur 3 insaani chamde ki roti !!!" chicken farmhouse ki tarah insaano ke farmhouse hote !! ooooooo...

Life is a Game

Hello All,

I have started blogging too and henceforth from now on you guys would have to bear one more homo sapiens of this green planet. Green planet reminds me of all stupid questions I have since childhood about this world. Unluckily, still today, I havent been able to get answers to them. These scientists keep changing their theories every time. First they said Newton laws are correct then they said no. Einstein laws are more accurate!!! They said universe developed from a big bang. Later on they come up with a new theory saying big bang never happened! Basically they just keep changing. It makes me think whether to believe them or not!! Who knows what’s going on outside our world? May be there are multiple universes, may be instead of attractive forces between the universal bodies there would be a only repulsive force existing. Just if we switch a button of wild imagination for our top floor we could develop n number of theories and even prove them through logic. :)

Anyways crap apart. Let’s get back to our real life which we can see and feel. I feel life is a game. Sometimes we win and sometimes we lose. There are n numbers of chapters in this game. There is always a winner and there is always a loser. Some people are there who take this life so seriously and so real that they start getting severely affected with the circumstances. Some even end up with heart attacks. Well at the end of the day everybody dies. So whats the point in becoming so serious about the things happening around us. Just take it as a game and play and enjoy.

I guess that’s enough for the day. It’s Sunday afternoon. I woke up just an hour before. :) Have to get ready and go out to eat something. There is nothing to eat in house right now except one of my room mate’s Cadbury. I have already swallowed it. Ok then will get back later.